Mickey Minnie Magic Kingdom Topiary
After many years of dreamy thoughts and countless vacation tales from your family members and friends; you finally pop the question to your partner;

“Shall we go to Disney?”

The responses from your partner can vary wildly, and may even surprise you, but there’s always that moment of deafening silence before a reply is heard.

Tragically, you may well be at the receiving end of a firm and solid “No!”

What happens next of course, is a matter of personal choice, as you are left with no other option than to take stock of your family’s long co-existence with a prospect of never, ever visiting Mickey Mouse!
Make no doubt about it; that fateful two letter word has resulted in the most sustained forms of punishment, ranging from;

He needs to grasp the gravity of the situation!

He needs to grasp the gravity of the situation!

  • A constant barrage of dreadful meals placed before the evil naysayer
  • Week upon week of sharp tongued jibes and withering looks (remove all ‘benefits’)
  • Deliberate placement of ‘his stuff’ in weird places just when he needs them most
  • Putting your feet up onto the dashboard of his beloved car
  • Threats to ‘sort out’ his music collection one day soon
  • Even the ultimate backlash; Disney related divorce!

When you are faced with a dreadful non-Disney vacation, it’s time to pull out the big guns and make your stubborn partner an offer he simply can’t refuse!

Dealing with the Excuses
This is the big hurdle.  Every reason that your Disney Villain, gives you, the Disney Princess, is almost certainly valid.  Place any hint of empathy towards the argument he gives and it’s all over.  During any of this part of your battle of good over evil, NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT!
Doing so will only strengthen his guesses, that a Disney vacation will be;

  • part_of_your_no_by_tsaoshin-d6f5s39too hot
  • too expensive
  • too far to travel
  • too much time to take off work
  • too soon for the kids
  • too much to organise

The problem is, he ‘for once‘ is absolutely right on most points, and you will be left floundering if you engage on almost any one aspect!
As far as body language goes, this is that time to look your best, go that extra mile; perfect hair, makeup, that special perfume he likes, that lovely dress and of course a big helping of cold shoulder.
He needs a lesson and fast.  Time to head out for a few cocktails with the girls.  Give him some thinking time and keep repeating the process until he makes a positive note.

If however, your battle of wits ‘with an unarmed man’ looks set to continue, you need to switch to research mode.

Rule #1
Never mention parades, princesses or shows from this point forward.  This is probably what he dreads and fears the most.  It’s best to pretend that it simply doesn’t exist at all, until of course you get there and he sees how fabulous it all is!

Rule #2
evil_has_a_beginning____by_tsaoshin-d7brxfkOnly tell him stuff about Orlando that he likes the best.
If he loves movies, focus on all of the movie related attractions.  If it is food, then Orlando simply won’t let you down.
Adrenalin fans will love the rides, but don’t abuse rule #1 and unravel all of your hard earned efforts with any hint of ‘it’s a small world’.

Rule #3
If he is a meanie, and claims you haven’t enough saved up, agree solidly and suggest strong and firm financial action, starting immediately with the Cable TV Premium package, and a suggested ‘year off’ from his favorite hobby.  You will be staggered at the immediate and seemingly overnight recovery of the economic climate in your home!

Rule #4
a_whole_new_no_by_tsaoshin-d6g7oweHave a few ‘rewards’ for the non committal vacationer.  If he loves motor-sport, treat him to a seat in a NASCAR at WDW’s circuit.  Sure it’s a few hundred bucks, but hey, look at all of that money that suddenly reappeared since you mentioned quitting golf!
Other fabulous and irresistible treats include; surf lessons, bass fishing, hot air ballooning, helicopter flights and just about anything else you can think of!
If it will press his ‘yes button’ then fill your armoury for your next round of vacation plan discussions over every possible meal.  (Don’t forget of course, that meal quality has inevitably slipped since you became devastated at the shock of not going to Orlando!)

Rule #5
Never, ever give up.  The first 6 weeks are the hardest, but statistically, yield a big fat ‘yes’ in most if not all circumstances, if you’ve followed our simple and effective campaign!

Rule #6
when_will_my_no_begin_by_tsaoshin-d6jae0eOK, so this is a confusing one; Never actually be reckless, but always make it crystal clear that reckless acts are already well under way and that unless he changes his responses, new, ones are in the pipeline!
(With deep and profound consequences that you couldn’t care less about!)

And Finally
I hope that this light hearted but very informative little blog post fills you with spirit at least, and ‘at best’ fills an airline seat with your hard working butt as you head for a well deserved vacation of a lifetime!
Your Disney villain partner may have good reasons to resist, but your job here is to understand those reasons, and to take responsibility for them and the upcoming vacation plans.
Do that, and do it well, and you will spend many a fabulous vacation in Orlando with your converted Disney Prince!

Hopefully, you will love our sassy spirit and book yourself one of our amazing luxury vacation homes!  Bring him too if you really must!